Comment please - Close up. - Printable Version

+- DSLR Photography Forum (https://www.shuttertalk.com/forums)
+-- Forum: Digital Photography Forum (https://www.shuttertalk.com/forums/forum-4.html)
+--- Forum: Photo Critique (https://www.shuttertalk.com/forums/forum-26.html)
+--- Thread: Comment please - Close up. (/thread-4560.html)

---

Comment please - Close up. - smarti77 - Jan 12, 2006

Although this shot is bit of a cliche but I have become quite attached to it..

I have done alot of fiddling with post processing and need your experienced eyes to tell me how it could have been or still could be made better...composition, colour / black and white, etc...

Taken with Pentax *ist DS, 28-80mm Sigma lens at 80mm in macro. 1/125sec, F5.6, 200 with flash.

---

Comment please - Close up. - shuttertalk - Jan 12, 2006

Stunning eyes, you have!

I think a closer crop could probably help - minus the left side especially, as the out of focus ear makes the photo look cluttered and distracting.

I love the detail on the features though - eyelashes, iris, etc. Well done!

---

Comment please - Close up. - Toad - Jan 13, 2006

I understand why you like this shot. With so little detail, you have managed to reveal a lot about the model. She looks intelligent, persceptive and sexy.

The eyes are the window to the soul.

---

Comment please - Close up. - guerito - Jan 13, 2006

This is beautiful. But...

The thing that really jumps out on me is the blurredness of the eyebrow in the upper right half of the picture. It seems that even the right part of the eye is slightly blurred.

I think you should have taken the picture with a considerably smaller aperture, f8 or even f11 to get everything sharp. At this distance, the DOF would have been still shallow enough to blur the ear (or hand?) on the left side, but you need sharpness for the immediate environment of the eye.

The suggested crop would be better IMO too...

---

Comment please - Close up. - Petographer - Jan 13, 2006

I would suggest a much tighter crop. Eye and eyebrowe only. The eye colour and detail are great.

---

Comment please - Close up. - Schellamo - Jan 13, 2006

A beautiful eye! My only critique has already been mentioned- closer crop and the top eyelid (models left side) looks a bit out of focus.

---

Comment please - Close up. - smarti77 - Jan 13, 2006

Thanks for the comments. I agree that the blurred left side (which is a hand) is distracting, I tried a tighter crop but didn't like the eye smack in the centre.

Toad - Thanks for the comments however 'sexy' isn't really what I was aiming for. The 'model' is my 7 year old son...

---

Comment please - Close up. - byrt_001 - Jan 13, 2006

hi

i think the tighter crop and sp that to straigten the eye...uuhhmmm maybe something like this





also to attrack more to the eyes maybe just lighten the eye a bit...


uuhmmm very deviantart?
goosh now? is his eye too light? goosh forgot my monitor againg... uuhmm

regards

christian

---

Comment please - Close up. - byrt_001 - Jan 14, 2006

hi

for those who may want ot know this is what i did...
duplicate layer, set to screen and applyed a mask and paint out what i did not wanted. use the markee tool and made lessection to use curves,



byeeeeee


christian

---

Comment please - Close up. - smarti77 - Jan 14, 2006

Thanks Christian - I do like that crop.

I also had a fiddle with the layers but got a little carried away...

---

Comment please - Close up. - Toad - Jan 14, 2006

smarti77 Wrote:Thanks for the comments. I agree that the blurred left side (which is a hand) is distracting, I tried a tighter crop but didn't like the eye smack in the centre.

Toad - Thanks for the comments however 'sexy' isn't really what I was aiming for. The 'model' is my 7 year old son...

Hah!! I could have sworn it was a woman's eys, but I guess that I have just become a pervert in my old age...

---

Comment please - Close up. - wulinka - Jan 14, 2006

That black and white is beautyful, and a good idea for this shot I think.
The iris got just a litte too blue, don't you find...?

nice work!

uli

uhm, and at second glance: what's that glary bit /dirt in the corner of his eye?

---

Comment please - Close up. - Schellamo - Jan 14, 2006

Your son has beautiful eyes! I love the patterns and the colours, they are awesome!
I would prefer the B&W if the original colours of the iris were kept.

---

Comment please - Close up. - wulinka - Jan 14, 2006




??

---

Comment please - Close up. - Schellamo - Jan 14, 2006

Nice!

---

Comment please - Close up. - byrt_001 - Jan 14, 2006

uli

i thought about.....your version

very nice, i think that's great

christian

---

Comment please - Close up. - Petographer - Jan 14, 2006

Toad Wrote:

smarti77 Wrote:Toad - Thanks for the comments however 'sexy' isn't really what I was aiming for. The 'model' is my 7 year old son...

Hah!! I could have sworn it was a woman's eys, but I guess that I have just become a pervert in my old age...

Oh man! I wondered when there was going to be a reply to that.

---

Comment please - Close up. - shuttertalk - Jan 15, 2006

I like your version the best, Uli - nice and tight, it really isolates the subject and makes it stand out. Nice!

---

RE: Comment please - Close up. - Beckylouise - Jun 13, 2013

(Jan 12, 2006, 22:18)smarti77 Wrote:  Although this shot is bit of a cliche but I have become quite attached to it..

I have done alot of fiddling with post processing and need your experienced eyes to tell me how it could have been or still could be made better...composition, colour / black and white, etc...

Taken with Pentax *ist DS, 28-80mm Sigma lens at 80mm in macro. 1/125sec, F5.6, 200 with flash.

I'm a firm believer of focusing on the eye for a portrait. That's my only criticism. Other than that, it's a brilliant shot!

---